tomhardyspinky:

theworldismyoster:

Convict Curry recipe

To feed four

7 x economy chicken quarters (‘There’s always someone what won’t want two.’)

4 x onions.

1 x jar of curry paste, ‘whatever sort they’ve got’.

2 x ‘cheap and cheering’ tins of tomatoes - Aldi, Sainsbury’s or Tesco.

Mushrooms, sweetcorn, ‘anything like that’. 

Mixed spice

Ground cumin

Fry the onions and the jar of curry paste together ‘until you feel satisfied’. Throw in your two tins of tomatoes, mushrooms, sweetcorn and chicken. Rinse out the curry jar and add the water, sprinkle in the mixed spice and cumin, stir, bring to a splattering boil and simmer for two and a half hours.

Source: Stuart: A Life Backwards by Alexander Masters

“Thanks, Pearl…!!

And thanks so much for your recipe, Vy..! You’re the first..!!”

Making this tonight, just about to go to the shops.

I can only figure that the cooking process will be much less adorable and heart-break/warming when I do it, as I won’t have a Stuart and “fucking geeky fucking wanking middle-class cunt fuck Alexander” to make it with me. I hope it still tastes nice, though.

I will also need to get bread while I’m out. “And you mop with the bread. Mop up your juices.”

(Source: theworldismyoysterrr)